How it all went down

December 3rd was my birthday.  For quite sometime we had been telling the nurses and doctors and whomever else would listen that all I wanted for my birthday was to bring my son home.  However, no one seemed very optimistic, especially the attending doctor.  December 2nd was a rough day.  I was drained and even though all Baby Z was doing was eating and trying to put on weight, he wasn't.  Bringing him home did not seem like it was going to happen anytime soon. And to make matters worse they had decided to move him to a new room, further down the maze of halls.  It was a bit disheartening. I had started to think of that room as home.

And we knew the routine so well.  Nathan said he could always tell how the day was going to be as he came down the hall towards the room.  If the nurses were outside chatting Baby Z was doing great.  If they weren't then we were in for more procedures.  It was just comforting to be in a place we knew and now we weren't.

   So on the morning of December 3rd when I called to let the nurse know I was planning on being there for the 9 am feeding and she told me that they had plans to discharge him, I was shocked.  I couldn't even enjoy the wonderful birthday breakfast my mother-in-law made me.  I just had to get there - I wasn't going to believe this until I heard it for myself at rounds.  So I rushed out the door, to the hospital, up the elevator, down the new hall and realized I had just missed rounds by about 30 seconds.  Rounds always start at 9 am and I was there at 9 am but since Baby Z got moved he was the first one and well I missed it and the nurse only had bad news to tell me.  They weren't going to discharge him because he wasn't gaining weight, instead they were going to start supplementing his bottles with formula.  We had had this nurse before and she was good and we liked her so I started to plead my case.  She listened and agreed and told me I needed to argue my case to the attending doctor so she went out and asked her to come back.  It is a bit intimidating to argue your case to a group of doctors but I just really felt that Baby Z was not going to gain weight in this environment unless I was there 24/7 and that would be exhausting to me, Nathan, and Addison.  And if I was going to be the one there taking care of him then why couldn't I just do that from home.  Everyone (including the attending doctor, chief resident, fellow, and nurses) had told me that babies tend to thrive better at home in a more natural environment.  So if we were just trying to get Baby Z to thrive why not send him home to the place he was most likely to thrive in.  If there were no other medical concerns then his weight gain then let him come home and gain weight.  This was what I argued, along with the fact that my daughter also had problems gaining weight when she was a newborn and I was very familiar with the need to and process of supplementing.  I even offered to drive back into DC once a day for a weight check if that was all they wanted.  The doctor then, amazingly, agreed to discharge Baby Z if I had a pediatrician willing to take over weight checks and she had to be able to speak with that pediatrician before we could go.  I love our pediatrician group for many, many reasons but that day I loved them because they have Saturday and Sunday hours so I could easily have them contact the attending and discuss.  Once this deal was struck I got on the phone to talk to my pediatrician, who contacted the resident and before I knew what was happening I was being told that my baby was coming home!!  I couldn't handle it.  I rushed to the bathroom -the only private place to make phone calls- and called Dad.  It was over.  We were going home.  It was over.

We were a bit unprepared to head home that day, we weren't expecting it.  So when I returned for lunch and we started to pack up it was a bit of madness.  Luckily we still had my mother-in-law in town, and Nathan's sister and her husband came into help. Additionally some of my close friends miraculously showed up to wish me a happy birthday and helped out too. It was a whirlwind of packing, rushing, excitement, relief - literally just plain craziness.  Nathan and I headed back to the hospital - the nurse had called and left us a message saying the discharge papers were completed and we could come pick up our son anytime we wanted - as if he was a pizza or car which just had its tires rotated.  So casual, so easy, just come pick him up.  And to be honest it really was that simple.  We got there, I fed him, we put him in the car seat, and we left.  Some of our favorite nurses came by to wish us luck and as we were walking out the door I felt like we should turn and run before they changed their minds. 

He is yawning, not screaming, although we could say he was shouting for joy.

As we drove away from CNMC we had to smile.  No more paying crazy parking prices just to visit your son (I calculated it - we sent over $100 in parking the three weeks we were there).  No more constantly sterilizing your hands - the scent of Purex hand sanitizer will always bring back these memories.  No more beeps and buzzers going off.  We are very grateful we were there... but never want to go back.  There are a few follow-up appointments however that will necessitate return visits.

We made a quite stop at the Ronald McDonald house to pick up the remainder of our stuff.  (Mother-in-law, Aunt, and Big Sister had taken most of it and headed back home earlier.) This house had become our home away from home.  It was a solemn place but a comfort too.  We are huge believers in the Ronald McDonald homes. 

  

And then we were off.  Back to our home.  To finally all be together as a family  Finally let Big Sister meet Baby Z.  It was heaven on earth.